Chapter 103 Calm down
Li Zhuangsheng thought of those youth pain movies he had watched before...the same stupid plots!
It first tells the story of the pure and erotic love between the hero and heroine for more than an hour. All the love that should be shared has been shared, and then the pain begins. In the end, the heroine must marry someone else under the arrangement of the stupid screenwriter and director whose brain is smaller than a walnut. Otherwise, how can it be called a regret?
Otherwise, how could the audience feel so upset and hate the stranger who married the heroine?
The hero and heroine are a perfect match, how come a minotaur suddenly shows up! Who are you, a passerby? Are you the protagonist? Why do you marry the heroine?

Back then, Li Zhuangsheng was also very angry at these tools who married the heroine, but now he suddenly thought, you kid, you won’t really make yourself the male protagonist, right?

Do you think the male protagonist is handsome? Did you have a girlfriend in high school?

You are the one who finally marries a wife, but it turns out that she has already loved and hated other men in her youth, and there is always an unforgettable white moonlight in her heart. As for you, the unlucky one, not only does no one sympathize with you, but you are also hated by the audience as a passerby!
You made the wrong substitution, brother!
There is also the "Pipa Song" that Li Zhuangsheng learned in high school. When he first read it, he was filled with emotion just like Bai Juyi, and even secretly hoped that the Pipa girl could marry this great poet. There are many people who think like him. Even Ma Zhiyuan, one of the four great Yuan opera masters, wrote a special play "Blue Shirt Tears" to arrange for the Pipa girl to marry Bai Juyi as a concubine... No, forget about others, but you are sick to think so, what does it have to do with you?

Are you Bai Juyi? Or are you empathizing with the Pipa Girl?
This Pipa girl is a bitch. The real pitiful one is obviously the tea merchant who married her!
Many people sympathize with the Pipa Girl. The background of the prostitute is so pitiful... What's pitiful about it?
She herself never lamented her identity as a "prostitute". She only felt sorry for herself as she grew older and her beauty faded, and she no longer had the glory of "being able to sing countless songs and wear countless red silks".

Even in her dreams, she missed her youth when she was "the best in the imperial music school" and those dashing "young men of Wuling".

As for her husband... he was never looked at straight in the eye when the woman's "silver comb on her head was broken by clapping, and her blood-red silk skirt was stained by wine". Even though the woman was old and ugly, and he worked hard to make money outside after taking over the business and could not return home for several months, he was only evaluated as "a businessman who values ​​profit over separation".

In the past, "after the song, I used to make Shancai admire me, and after I put on makeup, I would be jealous of Qiuniang", but now I can only "dream of my youth late at night, crying in my dream and my makeup was smudged with tears".

She is so wronged!
She didn't love the tea merchant. She looked down on him in the past, and she still looked down on him after she married him. But she couldn't do without his support.

Even when she met Bai Juyi and others, she would play some music to suggest herself, shyly holding the pipa with her face half covered, and amid the cheers of the crowd, she would "narrate about the happy days of her childhood, and how she is now drifting and haggard, wandering around the world", and then receive the sympathy of these upper-class literati... She must have been extremely satisfied in her heart.

When Bai Juyi and his companions were bored, they had a free high-class escort girl to play music for them, and the pipa girl relived her old dream of being adored by all the "Five Young Men of Wuling" and being vied for favor.

Everyone present was very satisfied.

I just don’t know what kind of expression would be on the tea merchant’s face when he returned home tired and heard the "Pipa Song" being sung outside.

Thinking of this, Li Zhuangsheng laughed even more happily.

"But, when we were in high school, you never... talked to me." Hu Mengdie sobbed aggrievedly.

"You're right. A coward like me doesn't deserve happiness. I'm a nerd who never dares to take action. I'm so self-important, but I can only passively wait for a girl who only exists in my imagination to fall in love with me and save me from the boring daily life... I waste my time because of my cowardice, but I blame others for not waiting for me. I'm such a joke..."

"You're not a joke! You're just...too gentle."

Li Zhuangsheng looked down at Hu Mengdie's pitiful tearful eyes and grinned: "But if I pursued you at that time, would you choose me? Would you like me?"

Hu Mengdie's heart trembled. She now had one and only one answer. She knew what she should say at this moment... However, she tried hard to open her mouth, facing Li Zhuangsheng's distressing eyes, but found that she could not make a sound.

"I... don't know." Hu Mengdie's voice trembled. She leaned on Li Zhuangsheng's shoulder, tears streaming down her face.

I don’t know, that’s the answer.

Li Zhuangsheng knew this very well. Who would be interested in him when he was in high school... Lin Yuehua, does that count?

"Believe me, I am not happy with Qi Haoyu at all. I don't have any feelings for him now. He hurt me a lot. It was you who saved me and brought me light! Don't be so self-deprecating. You are a good person. I don't think about anyone else now. You are the only one in my heart. Please believe me! And I want to tell you that, in fact, I and..."

"Okay, stop talking." Li Zhuangsheng gently covered Hu Mengdie's mouth. He didn't want to listen anymore. He was already extremely annoyed, especially when he heard Qi Haoyu's name from Hu Mengdie's mouth.

Hu Mengdie burst into tears immediately, bit her lips, and sobbed sadly: "... Don't you love me anymore?"

"I love you, who loves me?"

Li Zhuangsheng's voice suddenly changed, becoming hoarse and filled with uncontrollable anger.

Hu Mengdie was a little frightened by Li Zhuangsheng's momentum, but she still said solemnly: "I love you!"

"...Do you really love me?" Li Zhuangsheng's chest rose and fell, his face flushed red, and he finally vented, "You don't love me, you're just being a wife."

Hu Mengdie was stunned.

"Do you really regret it? Do you really love me? You just hate Qi Haoyu for hurting you. He won't love you anymore! You think I'm a good licker and the best solution for major events in life. Is this love? No, you just think of me as the correct answer to the test paper!"

"You're very nice to me, just like a waitress saying thank you for your patronage to me, very polite, but she can say that to every customer because it's her job! You too, you'll be like that no matter who you marry!"

"You don't love me at all, and you have never looked me in the eye. You are just fishing, and I am a cheap fish. No one has ever loved me, so any random bait can make me bite your hook and not let go! You are so smart, you are just loving yourself... In fact, everyone loves themselves, there is nothing wrong with that, but... don't you think this is unfair? Why!"

Li Zhuangsheng once again changed his usual gentle demeanor and revealed an aggressive and fierce look.

He regretted deeply: Why did I say this? This truth is too embarrassing for her. Stop talking, stop talking...

He really didn't want to say these words, he wanted to keep them to himself, but the pent-up anger in his heart was bubbling out.

Hu Mengdie's face turned from red to redder, as if blood was oozing out. Her face was as if burning, but a casual evening breeze made her body shiver.

Did he really forget? Why did he say the same thing as before? Originally, I still had a glimmer of hope, and I deceived myself into thinking that it was just Li Zhuangsheng's nonsense after getting drunk... But it turned out that they were all true words?
"What's wrong with you..." Hu Mengdie's legs went weak and she almost stumbled and fell.

"Why would I think so?" Li Zhuangsheng forced a funny smile on his face and tried hard to control his tone, "Yes, I am a bootlicker, but I am not a stupid dog!"

"By the way, you just asked me what I wanted, hahaha..." Li Zhuangsheng continued with a low, miserable laugh, "I just want you to be like me."

Stop it, stop it, stop the fucking talking!
"I want the surprise of your first gift, I want the heartbeat of your first kiss, I want the throbbing of your first encounter with the opposite sex, I want you to be unique and good to me, I want you to have no past before you met me, leaving a blank space waiting for me, I want you to devote all your love to me!"

"Can you give me what I want? You don't think I only care about the membrane you have now, something that can be repaired with a few thousand dollars!"

Despite everyone trying to stop him, Li Zhuangsheng still roared out all the words through gnashing teeth.

The depression that had been pent up in my chest for ten years finally dissipated at this moment.

(End of this chapter)