Chapter 322 Accomplice
Why didn't I lend a helping hand to Lin Yuehua back then? It's not like I can't do it, just like I am doing now, right?

Very simple!

Her life will be completely different. She will have a splendid life, instead of... setting up a stall to sell fruits on snowy days to supplement her family income.

Why is he dating someone else now when he knows her feelings? How does she feel every day?
If I had kept my distance from her from the beginning this time, I wouldn't have hurt others and myself, and ended up in a dilemma!
Damn it!
If they hadn't met again ten years later, he could still tell himself that he had a happy life. If they hadn't kissed each other that day, he could still tell himself that they were just good friends... Yes, he could continue to deceive himself!

Why didn't he recognize Zhu Zhixue back then? Why didn't he save her at the last moment, letting her fall into the abyss? It was so simple, so easy!

She had clearly given me countless chances, countless chances! As long as I seized one of them, the future of both of us would be changed!
But he even missed her last call for help. The gloomy look beneath her parting smile now appears in Li Zhuangsheng's nightmares almost every day.

The water in Xiangshan Park is so clear and cold. If she jumps in...wouldn't she be cold?

She loved him so much, they should have had a happy ending in the last life. She was like an angel, why did she become so muddy?

She is so good, she is obviously so good!
Even now, he was still dating her half-heartedly. She wanted to give him everything she had, but he couldn't figure out his own heart.

He made her timid and unconfident. He knew her inner hesitation, but he couldn't look her in the eye and tell her that he only loved her and there was no place for others!
He still couldn't give Zhu Zhixue the sense of security she wanted, and he made up for it with details in his actions...but he understood that Zhu Zhixue wanted a promise from him more than those things.

Why did he provoke Hu Mengdie? Didn't he promise not to marry a virgin and never settle for anything less? Why did he break his promise and then break his defense on his own?

What did Hu Mengdie do wrong? Why do you make her so miserable? Why should you let her pay for your mistakes?
Haha, it’s meaningless to say all this now. She has disappeared, leaving behind a heart full of regrets and sadness.

She is dead... I can no longer forget her. But not being able to forget her is hurting Zhu Zhixue!
Li Zhuangsheng was distressed by this internal friction, and even more distressed by himself who knew that such internal friction was meaningless but still refused to change!
He knew he was self-righteous, but he couldn't stop thinking about it.

I clearly haven't done anything evil, why does everything seem to be my fault!
"The sky is not falling... It's just that I have hurt so many people... I don't want to hurt her again... But this is not something I can decide. I really don't want to hurt anyone again..."

Li Zhuangsheng bit his lip, feeling somewhat painful, and hated his own weakness in his heart.

In a sense, he has always been in an ivory tower.

He has always been a carefree otaku. Even after graduating from college, he never worried about the future. He stayed in his nest all day long and could earn more than the average income of his peers just by typing on the keyboard.

He has never experienced any storms, and sometimes he is like a naive child... I really hate myself for being like this. I am just a nobody, but I worry about this and that all day long!
There is no ability to solve problems, just self-righteous compassion.

Li Xiuyu listened to Li Zhuangsheng's words quietly. After a long silence, she sat up suddenly and stared at Li Zhuangsheng. In the dark night, her eyes were like stars and her voice was gentle:

"It doesn't matter. If you have to hurt someone, then let's do it. Who can satisfy everyone? Just think of it as us hurting others together, because I encouraged you to do so. So, you are not the only murderer. I will bear all the faults and sins with you. Even if it means the death penalty, we will be shot together... We are accomplices, brother."

Li Zhuangsheng stared at Li Xiu Yu in a daze. After getting used to the darkness, he could see that Li Xiu Yu's expression was as gentle as the white clouds floating in the blue sky.

"...Okay." Li Zhuangsheng said.

Li Xiuyu smiled, rested her head on Li Zhuangsheng's arm again, and hugged him gently.

Li Xiuyu knew Li Zhuangsheng's character. Even if it was not his fault, as long as it was related to him, he would treat it as his own problem... It was only a matter of time before such a day came to him.

It's just that the original Li Zhuangsheng was either carefree or simply stayed at home and didn't interact with people, so he naturally avoided this character flaw. "We haven't slept together like this for a long time."

They didn't know how much time had passed, so long that both of them felt sleepy, and Li Xiuyu's voice echoed softly in the silence.

"It was not a while ago that..."

"That doesn't count. I mean, hugging you like this. I still remember when I was a kid, I watched zombie movies and I was so scared after watching them... If you let me hug you like this, I won't be scared anymore."

"You were still very young at that time, so you shouldn't be afraid now."

"I'm not afraid of zombies anymore, but I'm still afraid of the dark, so I always keep a night light on when I sleep alone. But when I'm with you, I'm not afraid at all."

"That thing, you still can't forget it?"

"Forget it. All I remember now is that you hugged me and carried me home at the end."

"You didn't trust anyone at that time and left me to carry it all by myself. It really exhausted me to death."

"Hehe, who made you my brother?"

"Am I... a good brother?"

"It must have been, but now that you have a girlfriend, whether it will be the same in the future depends on your performance!"

"Ah."

"Brother, you are the most important person to me...even my parents can't compare to you. I know you think so too."

"Ah."

"If one day...if you want, I can join you and become your enemy."

"Fool, why should we make enemies with the whole world?"

"Yes, I can't bear to let you become the enemy of the whole world..."

Li Xiu Yu muttered softly, and finally fell asleep in Li Zhuangsheng's arms.

Li Zhuangsheng blinked his eyes and heard Li Xiuyu's even snoring in his ears, while her unique fragrance also spread silently in the silence.

His mind was constantly thinking about Hu Mengdie's matter. He was most troubled and entangled about this matter today, but now, he had made up his mind, or rather, Li Xiuyu had told him what to do.

(End of this chapter)